One of the things with healthy dating is we don’t come from a lack place. It’s from “I want to be in a relationship” or “I’m desperate to find a relationship so I take whatever comes along”. You try to conform a person into who they think that they should be rather than knowing what you want in a partner.
When we come from that lack place, people can read it on you right away because that means you don’t have the self-esteem or self-confidence to just be by yourself. If you’re eager to get married soon, either you’re going to meet someone that’s abusive because they can smell that you’re just looking for a ring or a relationship. They hook you with manipulation and all these other emotionally abusive tactics in order to get you fall in love with them. But when you come from a healthy whole place, you spot abusive behavior a mile away and you don’t tolerate it because you know what it’s going to look like. Thus, what you want is a healthy person and you understand what a healthy person should look like.
Most people just take what’s coming at them and then try to conform them. That’s usually when arguments, fights, breakup and divorce happen a couple of years later because both people were not honest with who they are and what they want in a relationship.
So to ensure a healthy and long-lasting relationship, learn these rules of healthy dating;
You Know What You Want
Healthy dating is knowing exactly what you want in a partner. What are your values? What do you value in yourself you would want to see in another person? Be flexible but don’t compromise the important qualities and characteristics that mean the most to you.
You Expect Less
Healthy dating is when you’re actually dating, meeting people and knowing more about the other person. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket. If you’re doing online dating or just met someone, you will not expect too much because you’re confident within yourself, you know what you want and you trust the process. You’re not so eager and desperate to be in a relationship. You’re just going out there, interviewing people and getting to know them.
Balance Between Your Heart And Your Head
The hard part of healthy dating is the balance between your heart and your head. It’s so important to pick your partner from your head to your heart. What are you seeing from this person? Are they respectful, caring, sensitive or whatever these things that you want in a partner? How many times have you been in a relationship with someone and when the relationship ended, you look back and realized that the person actually didn’t have any of the things that you are looking for in a partner? You just let all of those feelings overshadow the logical part of your brain that was probably saying this person isn’t right for you.
The only way to find a balance between your heart and your head is by being conscious while you’re dating. So when you feel that you’re going ten steps ahead of the situation, you’ve got to be able to reel yourself back, that’s where self-taught comes into play. Don’t get yourself overly excited and just give yourself to a person when you’re just getting to know them.